Dreaming about planning out my death

Its funny, how I'm not dying, yet I'm already thinking of what to do to make sure that my family doesn't have to do too much planning. Its weird, and this is how I fall asleep at night. Besides wanting company. The more I want something to happen the more I feel stupid about myself. Weak. Miserable. When I don't care...heh. Yeah right, like I can really become the 'I-don't-care' person anymore. Thats gonna take some work. Typing on the blog is easier than writing on paper, because i'll have to constantly cross-out and rewrite it when i can just in one swift click I can delete something.

No Time.

Why do I feel like I don't have time for anything anymore?
I want to quit my work, but I can't because I don't want to be limited to how much I spend. My parents tend to make me re-think whenever I want to go out by saying, 'Stop wasting your money, you only get XYZ'. Hence I work. I get to drink and eat whatever I want. I only work once a week now. Not a big deal, not a big enough reason for me to quit anyway.

Feeling emo again.

I cant' seem to get my school work over with.

I can't focus.

My management is really weak.

Oh darn....

Well since its the new year. I should just make a new blog.
I have yet written or update anything in my diary.
Man I feel like my whole life is right before me.
Computer...Laptop....oh boy.